Monday, September 22, 2008

NOT Me! Monday

I'm joining in Mck Mama's Not Me Monday Carnival. Go on over and check out what others would never do....if you need a good laugh. Here's what I would never do. Seriously. Never.

My Not Me list.

I did not use my husband's razor on my legs and underarms during my shower this morning. I realize that his facial razors are much more spendy than my leg razors. And I am very aware that using them on my legs diminishes their usablility much quicker. That's why I'd never use his razor--against his will--even if I was cold and didn't want to get out of the shower to find mine. I'm much more trustworthy than that.

I did not take a package to the post office this morning without the address to send it to. Because really, that would be forgetful of me, and I'm not forgetful. And furthermore, I did not ask the postlady if she had internet access so that she might be able to google my friend's address since I couldn't reach her on my cell. That would be ridiculous.

I did not spill my thermos of coffee on my leg in the car on the way to drop Julia off at Preschool. And I for sure did not spill my bottle of water on my hip, rear, and thigh on the way back to pick her up. I'd never do that. I'm quite the cautious driver and find that drinking and driving only leads to major distractions.

I did not almost clip a new BMW on the way back home this morning. I'd never take my eyes off of the road, even to secretively watch Julia praise Jesus by clapping and singing to Life Song behind me in her carseat.

I definitely did not meet a police car while driving 13 miles over the speed limit this morning. Even if Luke and I lost track of time while playing together at the park while Julia was at school, I would never speed in hopes to pick her up on time. And even if I did meet a police car while speeding, which I would never do, I would not shed tears or nearly wet my pants as I saw his break lights in my rearview mirror. I'm mature and things like "break light warnings" don't scare me.


I did not question my capability as a licensed driver today. I'm very careful while I'm on the road. I wish all those other loonatics behind the wheel were too.


4 Little Men and Twins said...

oh my what a trip! :)


Krystal said...

Oh my goodness, you've had a busy day!

It never fails as I am backing out of my driveway to go somewhere I spill something on me.

Enjoyed it and thanks for stopping by my blog!

singing mama said...

Brillant, can def relate - I often forget addresses for the post.

-fellow Mckmama reader-


Kelly said...

I too had a visit from a police officer for going through a yellow light. I am so fighting this ticket. My only ticket, and I am almost 31.

Ehlan said...

I love it! :) Thanks for sharing!

proudmommy4 said...

love the not me's too much fun! i also love seeing another mommy with kids so close! i feel like i am the only one sometimes and people look at me like i'm some sort of freak show! we have amelya who is three and a half, breigh is a little over 2 and caitlyn just turned one. and i'm having number for in a matter of weeks. love the craziness! :) anyways your not me's are great. :)

Faith Hope Love Mama said...

You are so funny. I'd shed some tears if it was me also. I love all these posts about swapping and hubby. You are one lucky lady and greatly blessed also. Happy b-day to your hubby. :)